Conscious Living Requires Courage

Worry and fear are thieves that rob us from the ability to change.

Never Broken by Jewel


 

Why do we wait to create the life we want? Do we really know ourselves? Why do we stay in relationships that we know are draining us from life itself and shutting our heart down? Why do we ignore what our soul is craving? Why do we keep telling ourselves stories that it is okay, when we know it could be better?

It takes great courage to leave a life we have created unconsciously. Maybe the life we create in our 20’s isn’t the life we truly want in our 30’s. Maybe the person we thought would be a good partner, turns out to be someone who doesn’t want to grow.

What do you do when you have settled for a lower standard of life only to wake up one day and see there is so much more to make of your life? What do you do when you realize the person you married and have children with, is not someone who is making you a better you and hasn’t been intentional about being a parent?

Why is it so hard for us to trust what our heart and soul are revealing to us? In quiet moments you feel the warmth of truth flowing through your blood and there is a surge of clarity. Why do we then retreat from that clarity and render ourselves powerless to follow our heart? Why is it easier to get in bed with fear than it is with truth?

If this is the one precious life we have been given to make the most of, why aren’t we getting to know ourselves enough so we live it to the fullest? Everywhere I look, I see people living unconsciously. They are in marriages where one partner has to be prodded to engage with their children, or they put their time in at the office only to come home and park their ass in front of the T.V. and never lift a finger to share in household duties or parenting or getting to know their primary partner better.

I look around and see relationships that are disconnected and hanging by threads. I see people stuck in unhealthy cycles of communicating and they don’t seem to care about changing. Why continue to just settle for what is? Why is it so hard for us to imagine a life that fulfills us and take steps to see it manifest?

I don’t have answers to these questions. I just think them a lot. Everyday. The more I am conscious to what is happening around me, including my life, the more passionate I get about staying in touch with my heart and following it. I’m not expecting a perfect life. I’m not anticipating a life free from pain and struggle. I just want to stay alive, in the moment. Conscious. Present. I don’t want to fall asleep at the wheel of my life. I don’t want to become numb. If I am not active in how my life unfolds, I can be sure that society and others will shape it for me.

I am gladly haunted with the realization that I could be on my deathbed wishing I had taken more risks, spoken more freely, lived more wildly, and loved more fiercely. The thought of being at the end of my life and seeing the thread of worry and fear weaved throughout the decades of my life, makes me vigilant to BE PRESENT now. Everyday. Every moment.

I will not let fear and worry rob me of the change I need make to be fully alive. I will not run from hard things. I will be courageous and conscious. I will not waste one moment settling for things that do not bring light into my life. I will follow my heart. I will take risks. I will speak freely. I will live more wildly and love more fiercely. NOW. Not tomorrow. Not next year.

Are you watching your life go by or are you consciously LIVING it?

Photo Credit - Eutah Mizushima

Photo Credit – Eutah Mizushima


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